*gets in Uber*
Brain: WAIT! Do you have 📱?
*rifles thru bag, finds 📱*
Brain: Bet you forgot 🕶
*rifles, finds*
🎟?
🎟
Br—
Please stop.#travel

— Lynne Blaszak (@girlgloaming) August 17, 2016

In terms of new album fodder, I wonder if @joshritter seeing a good moon is like @taylorswift13 having a bad breakup.

— Lynne Blaszak (@girlgloaming) July 21, 2016

Waiting for the day I'm so caught up on everything in life that I sit right down & read the Univ college mag I've rec'd monthly since 1999.

— Lynne Blaszak (@girlgloaming) May 18, 2016

Uber. Where a coatless Midwestern girl of N. European stock politely swelters while a bundled-up driver fm a tropical clime blasts the heat.

— Lynne Blaszak (@girlgloaming) May 2, 2016

One way to ruin a great song overnight is to make it your alarm sound.

— Lynne Blaszak (@girlgloaming) April 14, 2016

I thought it was so clever to wake up to The Postal Service's snappy tune "Sleeping In." But no. Hit snooze 6x, ruined it forever. #Pavlov

— Lynne Blaszak (@girlgloaming) April 14, 2016

When you take a sip of water in your meeting and realize that nice tall glass you nabbed from the office kitchen is a flower vase.

— Lynne Blaszak (@girlgloaming) March 4, 2016

Under attack in Wash Sq. Not a drill. They're taking hostages using a 2-yr contract. Save us @TownofBrookline… pic.twitter.com/hEBm2nGmcP

— Lynne Blaszak (@girlgloaming) January 29, 2016

A dear friend told me I'm her "voice of reason" and now I don't think we should hang out anymore.

— Lynne Blaszak (@girlgloaming) January 22, 2016

New walk of shame:
1. Get out of bed.
2. Return to restaurant fm which you just walked home.
3. Reunite w/car at meter.
4. Drive home.

— Lynne Blaszak (@girlgloaming) October 1, 2015

In the unlikely event you should encounter curiosity about what I'm thinking, carefully follow the procedure below:

1. Ask

— Lynne Blaszak (@girlgloaming) April 2, 2015

Throughout her life, she'd strapped herself into other people's roller coasters, only to realize it when everything was upside-down. #FP

— Lynne Blaszak (@girlgloaming) March 27, 2015

I'd have a lot to offer as a restaurant restroom critic.

— Lynne Blaszak (@girlgloaming) February 9, 2015

I don't care if you love me more than words can say. Come up with something.

— Lynne B. (@girlgloaming) February 4, 2015

Words I saw in print today: Don't quit your day dream.

— Lynne Blaszak (@girlgloaming) January 5, 2015

BREAKING: 4th restless Ebola health worker exp to contagion launches new Food Truck, currently criss-crossing Southeast to feed the masses.

— Lynne Blaszak (@girlgloaming) October 17, 2014

Hey. Life. How about using your blinker every once in a while?

— Lynne Blaszak (@girlgloaming) October 14, 2014

"Come right in," the best cabbies & therapists say, no matter how late, no matter the baggage. "Your emergency just became my emergency."

— Lynne Blaszak (@girlgloaming) October 6, 2014